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Gregg Turkington’s Classic Movie Time – Episode 1

06/02/2021

Gregg Turkington’s Classic Movie Time – Episode 1

06/02/2021

129 thoughts on “Gregg Turkington’s Classic Movie Time – Episode 1

    1. This is an instant classic; what a truly memorable start to what I’m sure will be a financially fruitful and intellectually stimulating ride for many, manyears to come.

      1. Classic Movie Time? More like Classic Movie CRIMES 🤣🤣😉
        You can add trespassing to the list of Gregg’s criminal history (which includes murder, copyright infringement, insurance fraud, and vehicular assault). And it looks like he gave up on his coveted coding system too, because he didn’t ruin the box with his ugly red tape. What a disaster. No wonder he’s only a temporary intern for HEI Network 🤣😉

      1. Immediately upon viewing the content above three things become clear:

        – It lacks energy
        – It lacks direction
        – It lacks character

        This isn’t to say that all future content presented by Mr. Turkington can’t be good – it is indeed possible that he succeeds. Obviously, it’s very unlikely.

        So the obvious question is why did Tim take a doomed project like this on? The answer you can find in a separate document I posted titled “Initial Reactions” to the video.

    1. He didn’t do shit for this and you know it. This is Gregg’s baby, Axe was just contractually-obligated to put his name in the credits. Get back to me when Rock House takes off.

    2. Axiom is totally beefing Hot Carls in the hot tub at ROCK HOUSE.
      And he’s totally carling Hot’N’Hards in the yard at BEEF HOUSE.
      Fill me up . . . AGAIN!

  1. Thanks to Axiom’s influence and contrl Gregg was held to a hire standerd of vid eo graphy. Nice. 4 bags of popcorn nad a steadicam for good camera work.

  2. Tim your network is being let down by low quality, lazy content like this. Bringing Gregg back was a mistake but there’s still time to prevent things getting worse

  3. CANT HARDLY WAIT was released in 1998!
    NOT 1999!!!
    TURKEYTOWN got the release year WRONG!
    Plus, no mention whatsoever of RUNTIME (101 min)???

    Stunning production values, but this was obviously RUSHED to quickly generate content for HEI.
    AXIOM’s not cut out for high-end film production.

    1. He really knows how to spread DISINFORMATION among the movie viewing public!
      Executive Producers need to be FACT-CHECKERS!
      And not publish the wrong release year!

      The only thing Axiom is qualified to produce is a BROWN COIL in the toilet bowl at ROCK HOUSE . . .

  4. This worried me. Gregg this is not you and this is NOT the VFA, I hope to see it back in your hands fully soon! #SaveTrueVictorvilleFilm

    1. Classic Movie Time? More like Classic Movie CRIMES 🤣🤣😉
      You can add trespassing to the list of Gregg’s criminal history (which includes murder, copyright infringement, insurance fraud, and vehicular assault). And it looks like he gave up on his coveted coding system too, because he didn’t ruin the box with his ugly red tape.

      What a disaster. No wonder he’s only a temporary intern for HEI Network 🤣😉

      1. AXIOM is the force that pinches off stools into the pool at ROCK HOUSE.

        The only thing AXIOM creates are the skid marks in his eurotrash gold-lamé banana-hammocks.
        AND HE DOES THAT THRICE DAILY! HOO-HAH!

        1. I agree with the sentiment but there is no call for foul ideas in a public forum, many of us are just here to appreciate the movies

  5. Bring the ACTUAL tape of the MOVIE to the where it all started is so genius could’ve only come from genius like GREGG (not axmion)

  6. As EP, Axiom is not onyl the brains but the RESERCH behind this new segment! thankfully Gregg is letting the REAL real mister movie shine thru

  7. Amazing. I can only imagine how exciting it is to be there in person! If the Hei Network can keep up this level of quality it might actually be a success.

  8. “Dazzlingly immersive. *****” — EdithHead2022 on GREGG TURKINGTON’S CLASSIC MOVIE TIME – EPISODE 1. But I look forward to epsiodes that m ention wardrobe.

  9. Gregg has such nice nail(s). I can’t help but nibble at mine when I don’t have a bag (or 5) of popcorn sitting in my little lap! The moviegoers curse!

  10. Really good! For future episodes, may I suggest bringing a second copy of the tape and gifting it to whoever is currently living at the locations? Would be a great memento and some of them might not even know the significance of where they live!

  11. Enough of this sh!T! Is this a f@ckig joke?? Enough movies!!! Ban all movies NOW!!!! I need Joe Esteves’ advice. I am literally drowning in debt and Cannot Hardly Weight is going to help me??? How does this help anyone??? It’s bullsh1t!!! No one cares! I need financial help ASAP!!!! Please give us JOe!!!

    1. I respect your opinion but respectfully disagree, without movies we would not be blessed with such cultural milestones as Champions : A Love Story (1979) and Blinded by the Light (1980)

  12. This is EXACTLY what the HEI Network needs! A brand new creative segment from Gregg, with an original idea and great movies! Keep it coming Gregg 🙂

  13. Is this technology marketable to the government because if so Gregg should sell it and get his own network and be free of HEI and Axum and we get the movie expertise we actually want

    1. Bleeding edge tech like this IS from the military!
      You can’t buy 9th Gen VR Immerso-vision cameras off the shelf at Best Buy, fer crissakes.
      Ditto for Amazone.
      And don’t even think about what LEO satellite uplink broadband costs per second, because you don’t want to know.

    1. Holy Spicoli, that’s PROFOUND.
      You may have the genesis of a whole new religion in that mustard seed . . .
      No juke, no joke!

      1. We should appeal for some type of rating system for the comments. Movies have ratings systems, why not comments? I think the Hei Network should approve only PG13 rated comments, and leave NC17 comments for other platforms

  14. Initial Reaction:

    I find the video presented to be neither entertaining or indicative of future content on HEI Network. Essentially, Tim had to take on Gregg’s content and his very few fans if he wanted any recompense at all. Gregg, being a man who lives in his car, lacks the financial resources that a man like Tim would conventionally be awarded in a civil lawsuit against Gregg for his Admitted Illegal Acts. So, he took what he could. It’s not much, but it’s all Gregg has which is still less than what Tim and HEI Network is owed.

    – AAL

    1. “being a man who lives in his car”

      Which happens to be a replica TIME MACHINE!
      DUH!
      Go back to snorting poppers with Raymond Burr, desk jockey . . .

      1. This response doesn’t address the central point – that I contend that Gregg is (technically) capable of producing good content HOWEVER the data that’s available to us suggests it will not happen. These childish emotional responses only serve to stunt Mr, Turkington’s growth as a person.

        We oughtn’t live in Gregg’s blind spots for him.

        We oughtn’t lie and feign joy while he provides none.

        We oughtn’t promote his demise.

        1. One question, Counselor:
          Does the legal mumbo jumbo come FROM the adrenochrome or is it just a side-effect?

          Look–bottom line is Craig got the year of release WRONG for CAN’T HARDLY WAIT (1998, 101 min).
          That’s just Prima Fauci BLACK LETTER LAW.
          It COULD be related to some kind of Mandala effect, but is more likely due to the goldbricking, slackjawed, mouthbreathing EXECUTIVE PRODUCER duties that AXIOM is so woefully bereft of performing.

          AXIOM should stick to pinching off loafs into the sofa at SAUSAGE FRATERNITY and playing the four open guitar chords he knows.
          THAT’S IT. OBJECTION SUSTAINED. CASE CLOSED.

        2. I should hardly be responding to such stupidity but your embarrassing description of courtroom procedure requires my attention.

          Proof of your intelligence deficit lies in your inability to string together logic-chains that lead to fact by deduction.

          As for the rest of that kindegarten haiku, not interested.

    2. Many are saying that Gregg’s segments are making bank for HEI network and in a few months will pay 10x what a civil jury would have awarded Tim for Gregg’s Admitted Illegal Actions. It’s definitely a win-win, just not for Gregg, only Tim.

      1. “Proof of your intelligence deficit ”

        You cut me to the quick, sir.
        But I’ll have you know:
        I have an Associate Law Degree from the San Ramon School Of Jurdisprudence.
        And I KNOW how to wield it!

        CASE CLOSED COUNSELOR!
        KA-KLANG!!!!

  15. Classic Movie Time? More like Classic Movie CRIMES 🤣🤣😉
    You can add trespassing to the list of Gregg’s criminal history (which includes murder, copyright infringement, insurance fraud, and vehicular assault). And it looks like he gave up on his coveted coding system too, because he didn’t ruin the box with his ugly red tape. What a disaster.

    No wonder he’s only a temporary intern for HEI Network 🤣😉

    1. Now now, theres no reason for such inflammatory accusations. Gregg may not be perfect, but he has done a lot to highlight the contributions of some stars of yesteryear that are still burning in the hearts of the tinseltown spectators

  16. It’s crazy how modern technology can show the tape of the movie against the actual location of the movie. So you look at the tape, but then look up at what’s “in” the tape (but not really “in” because it’s the actual location)! I can’t wait for future episodes!

  17. Wow Gregg really goes above and beyond for Lady Hollywood! The only thing better than this would be filming it closer or maybe even inside the house! Possibly late at night during the magical hour (film buff term)!

  18. Wow. I learn more from Gregg in 1 minute than 3 hours on film school… plus I’m drinking vaxxblocker shake & it helps me focus – so thankful for Hei Inc

  19. “Can’t hardly wait” it something of a double negative, but this new segment is more of a double POSITIVE – real shooting locations AND the physical product of the shooting.

    I wouldn’t normally quote Dekkar, but “fill me up again!”
    (with more of this innovative movie magic!)

  20. I’d love to see a behind the scenes “The Making Of” of this edition of movie classics. Will there be any “extras” offered to this content? Would be interesting to learn Axiom’s contributions to the content.

    1. Can’t Hardly Wait Heads were bidding that house up into the many millions, so the owners already know but would likely welcome any chance to talk about Can’t Hardly Wait and all the scenes shot there. Hopefully they’ve recreated the sets exactly.

  21. This is what makes paying $9999 for the lifetime subscription worth it.

    There should be an upgrade to get rid of the HEI Network logo in the beginning and all mentions of #TIM.

  22. I am in tears. Seeing a VHS returned to its home like this is just so beautiful. Thank you so much Gregg! You truly are a master of cinema!

  23. This was excellent (the movie and this installment of movie time location) as I had always thought the house was apart of the Studio back lot and wasn’t a real house. Cheers to Hollywood!

  24. I had no idea that movie or that house existed. Thank you HEI Network for broadning our collective cultural appreciation of fine cinema.

  25. Like all true movie buffs I watch Gregg’s segments to find out how long movies are. Because this vital piece of information was left out I had to take a bag off to bring my review of this clip down to 4 bags. The house looked pretty cool, though, so I threw back in an extra bag for the full 5 bag rating.

  26. This post is the second post of my new segment WARDROBE CLASSICS. I’m EdithHead2022 and in this episode I’m excited to spotlight WEEKEND AT BERNIE’S II (1993, 97 mins), costume design by Fionn. The film stars Andrew McCarthy and Jonathan Silverman, seen here in some of their WEEKED AT BERNIE’S II outfits: https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0108539/mediaviewer/rm2721615360/
    This has been WARDROBE CLASSICS with me, EdithHead2022. Good night… and good wardrobe!

    1. Allow me to add what a got-damn HONOR it is to have this humble, half-assed, cobbed-together piece-of-shit message bored GRACED by your LEGENDARY presence, Mrs. HEAD!

      I think we ALL can agree:
      MORE HEAD! MORE HEAD!
      MORE HEAD! MORE HEAD!
      MORE HEAD! MORE HEAD!
      MORE HEAD! MORE HEAD!
      MORE HEAD! MORE HEAD!
      MOOREHEAD! MOOREHEAD!

      {insert Mark Proksht singing “ARTHUR’S THEME” by Chris Cross}
      {insert Tim Heidekker singing “NO MORE LONELY NIGHTS” by Paul McCartney}
      {Cue image of HEAVEN}

        1. I can’t see any space between your fingers there, Ms. HEAD.
          But I know you realize that your THRONE casts an immense shadow over the whole of cinema.
          A shadow that we all bask in, and are grateful for.
          (It gets HOT out here in Hollywood, kids!)

          You & the LATE, GREAT Eiko Ishioka are my HEROINS.
          Eternally entwined like the sigul of Caduceus, forever preserving & enshrining the immortal flame of COSTUME DESIGN!

          Cinema is truly nothing without wardrobe. Think about it:
          Do you really want naked people walking around and driving cars without clothes?
          (Have you actually seen MARK SINCLAIR naked? AL PACINO? MICHAEL DOUGLAS? DANNY DeVITO? Don’t even ask. Blindness is preferable!)
          Just as clothes make the actor, so does wardrobe make the CHARACTERS!
          Plus, we don’t want to vomit watching the movie.

        2. If there were Special Oscars for fans, which there shuold be, the first one should. go to HOLEDEN MADICKEY for understanding thta the majesty of the silver screen depends on WARDROBE, NOT NUDES. Reply if you believe there should be Specaial Oscars for fans

  27. This was so good…love that Gregg revealed the VHS to show us that it was PG-13, but not enough to also show the runtime. Little surprises to keep us guessing.

  28. I was worried about Axiom’s role as producer, but if this first episode of “Classic Movie Time” is any indicator, he knows exactly what to do – let the expert be the expert!

  29. 5 bagger, anyone? I couldn’t hardly wait to see this movie and buy the video on Disney DVD or Blue Ray. 💯 minutes

  30. Interesting segment but I would suggest for future classic movie time installments choosing either Smokey Bites the Dust (1981) or Butcher, Baker, Nightmare Maker (1981)

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